My Best Compliments!

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There is such a lot of online hate going on, people bullying and insulting each other anonymously – as long as one doesn’t have to confront another person, it seems terribly easy to let it all out. Maybe that’s why real-life-complimenting, on the other hand, seems to be considered as somewhat outdated. And I don’t only talk about men flattering women they seek to impress (and win over). It’s the same with your average ‘Oh, mum, that was a lovely dish today!’. Maybe especially young people are just shy because they’re used to writing comments like ‘What a lovely dress, you look fab. xxx’ only in that safe and sound online community where they won’t ever get an irritated gaze. But true, sincere complimenting makes us happy – the ones who pay compliments as well as the ones receiving them. That’s why I intend to write an article for a local newspaper commenting on compliments, especially amongst younger people and between young and older ones. It’s a paper covering just a small area, but it matters to me nevertheless.

And here’s what I need your help for: I want to publish a collection of compliments.

I’m therefore asking you to submit a compliment you recently received or paid by commenting on this post.
Feel free to submit more than one.

I declare to protect your anonymity. You can give your first name and home country, but if you don’t, I won’t spy on your ‘About’. It’s just about the variety of compliments and spreading a little bit of love, names don’t matter. Your first name won’t appear in the local newspaper if you don’t specifically submit it.

 Thank all of you for taking part in something that means a lot to me.

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33 thoughts on “My Best Compliments!

  1. Well you called me brave today in your comment to my blog post. That’s always a great compliment to hear. 🙂

    My roommate is an environmental activist. He’s working on a documentary project about climate change right now and I told him he had an amazing heart that would take him far in life. I made myself feel good telling him that. Funny how giving compliments feels just as good as getting them!

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  2. This is such a breath of fresh air! You have pinpointed the dilemma of trivial social media taking away from real social interaction. Heartfelt compliments seem to be a thing of the past. I am so pleased that you are writing about this issue, as the fundamental building blocks of manners and social interaction need to be retaught, so that they are not lost. I greatly appreciate your thoughtful prose and wish you well with your article! Congratulations!!
    Barbara in Australia

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    1. Barbara, thank you kindly for encouraging this idea, I take it for a real compliment. You are welcome to add a compliment you paid or received yourself. Also – happy International Women’s Day!

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      1. Thank you amazedgrazing! Today I had a phone call from my 5 year old grandson, Jack.
        He wanted to know what was my favourite cake, as the family are coming tomorrow to celebrate my birthday,(being a long weekend here). He said to his mother, previously, perhaps we should make a vanilla one, as that is safe. She suggested ringing and asking.
        I was able to say ‘Chocolate!’, as I know that is his favourite. It made me feel very loved hearing how excited he was to be coming to visit. Sometimes actions speak louder than words!

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  3. I was talking to my Dad about a situation I was going through, and about the strengths I had to survive it thanks to the lessons he and my mother taught me as a teenager. As my Dad ended the conversation with me he said, “I am so incredibly proud of my children [my two brothers and myself], my children are the diamonds of my eye. Not apple, you are diamonds.”

    It is always nice to know that your parents are proud of you and the person you have grown to become. Becoming an adult, leaving the nest, getting married and starting your own family is scary for a parent to watch, so having my father tell me he is still proud of me means so much.

    And in turn, I am thankful for the lessons I was taught by my parents, which I remind them of as often as I can.

    Monica (California, USA)

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  4. As it’s International Women’s day today I wanted to write a post about women who inspire me, and there was only one real option – my mum. She’s always been a strong and supporting person so she is the women who has always inspired me. However, before I posted it I wanted to check that she was OK with me writing about her and when I told her she was really touched. I know that she knows that I love her and that she means a lot to me but I think telling her directly made her feel extra special. And I tell you what – it made me feel really good too. There definielty needs to be more of this, and everyone needs to tell the people they love how they feel a lot more often!
    Check out my post at: http://beautifullybony.wordpress.com/2014/03/08/international-womens-day-which-women-inspire-you/

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  5. This is a wonderful and beautiful idea. Spreading love rather than hate.

    The nicest and most encouraging compliment I have ever received was from my best friend, my everything, my mother. When I was down and going through a troubled faze, she came into my room, held my hand and said:
    “Darling, my beautiful girl, keep smiling and keep dreaming. Your tears will drown you in sorrow, but your smile can change a nation, so keep smiling. I am so proud of you and I always will be”.

    Those words touched my heart and my soul. We forget just how amazing a mother-daughter bond really is. It was from that moment that I made sure I would always smile and do good deeds.

    Thank you for letting me share this with you. Happy International Women’s Day

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    1. Oh, thank you! It’s a most beautiful story. Such a bond seems to be the most natural thing in the world, but we need to tell each other. It does matter and it does fill our lives with beauty. I’m so happy you took part, thanks again!

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  6. Twice a week we have a Zumba class taught at a nearby church. Our beautiful instructor empowers everyone in her class, which is 98% women of every shape, size, age and race, 1% men and 1% children. Just as she empowers us, each of us re-channels that love right back to her by reassuring her how much of a blessing she is to us, and what a beautiful and encouraging spirit she has. So often, we have a tendency to exhaust our energy by nurturing others with everything we have and it is not re-channeled in return, (not that we expect it) but it helps us to give so much more.

    I try to give compliments out every day in some way, whether I’m in the grocery store, at the car repair shop or filling my car with gas. I can’t remember them all, but I know how wonderful it feels when someone pays you a compliment. I was writing a check (yes I still use them) to pay for something the other day and the cashier complimented my handwriting. I know that handwriting is not stressed as much as it used to be before we became saturated with the current digital era, but knowing that someone noticed made me feel nice!

    Thank you for giving your readers the opportunity to do something nice for a change. Lord knows we all too often see the negative and it’s refreshing to see you focus on the beauty and power of positivity and compliments! Thank you for doing this and initiating this awesome project, AND Happy International Women’s Day to ya! 🙂

    Kym from North Carolina (USA)

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  7. Great idea, so nice to see a positive blog post on kindness!

    I paid a compliment yesterday, to a friend of mine’s girlfriend. I’ve only known her a couple of years now, but I told her how glad I was she was with my friend, as she was so fun and easy going and had made him really happy. She was totally chuffed!

    My fiance told me yesterday what a great mum he thought I was, which is always lovely to hear. He’s fab, but isn’t always ‘big’ with words so they mean a lot when he says them, and I know he really means it.

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    1. It’s not about ‘being big with words’ at all, it’s about sharing a moment of appreciation and love – it simply happens and feels wonderful. Thank you so much for sharing your lovely compliments! I’m so glad you contributed to this little project.

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  8. My favorite complements run along the lines of, “Whenever I come in to see you, you make me smile!” Sometimes smiling works better than medicine to heal what ails you. Thanks for doing something positive here!

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  9. I had a job that was very involved with customer satisfaction and we used to take a lot of heat for not doing what the customers wanted. But there were a few people there that would say to us “thank you, you’re doing your best and I thank you for that.”

    It’s great to be recognized for your work within your situations and be understood. After these experiences I try to do the same thing to others who have to deal with people all day.

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  10. It’s a little bit of along read but hopefully it’s worth the read!

    I work at a supermarket, it’s not that flash and most of the time I get ignored from customers and people don’t think I’m worth the conversation. Even though I am studying at university, a lot people who come in make the assumption that working there is full time and although I don’t disrespect the people who do work there full time because it’s their source of income it’s simply not my career and I hate it when people stereotype me because I seem like another Indian in another retail store. I try to make conversation and about 5/8 times it works other times like I’ve said it doesn’t work, but one night I had, had enough of it and just thought I want to close up the deli and just go home so in the process of closing up an elderly lady came in and I thought gah I just want to leave, but I looked at the lanyard around her neck and it said TVNZ it sparked interest and I asked her about it. She went on to tell me about how she is a cleaner there and although it is interesting it was like any other cleaning job but she’s just doing this so she can support her family which are living with her. As I do communications this is ideally where I would love to get a job, so talking to her she encouraged me to keep going with my degree and that even if nothing happens with it, I have at least have that to back me up, her belief that I could get somewhere from just talking with me astounded me and that you can still have blind faith in strangers. As we kept talking I told her that I respect that she’s a cleaner and that even though people don’t want to pick up after themselves you have to be thankful for the people that do and do it with a smile. I just couldn’t believe how lovely she was even after a long hard day and that she just kept going because she wanted to support her family and their endeavours. I wished people like her got more recognition for their jobs, because people have a stereotype to believe that they are poor or uneducated, but at the end of the day many of them have the kindest souls and the purest hearts. After talking with her and giving each other confidence boosts about the lifestyles we had picked, I had not regretted saying hello to her because she gave me faith in how you can still believe in strangers and that it’s about the attitude you choose to live your life which will determine your happiness.

    Jaina Vallabh, New Zealand

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful story! It was absolutely worth the read. It’s lovely how you encouraged each other – things like these have to happen more often. Thanks again!

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  11. It’s funny that I saw this today because we actually talked about complimenting today in my peer resource class. Anywho, here’s my compliment:

    I was at the cash register with my mother when the cashier told my mom that her pink shirt made her look radiant.

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  12. I give compliments where and when I can, as I think there are so few about these days. I told my childminder today that I was so grateful for her flexibility, and I couldn’t run my life without her. She replied she was glad to be there.
    I’ve also given compliments in the past to bar or restaurant staff who have been particularly helpful or attentive. I remember asking to speak to the manager once, and she automatically assumed I’d have a complaint. To compliment her staff member came as a shock to her. Perhaps a reminder that gratitude is rare and precious these days.

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    1. Thanks kindly for your contribution! It’s astonishing how we seem to be used to critique rather than compliments. Lovely to hear that you are one of these kind people changing our minds.

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